I am well aware that I am far from perfect and I will be the first to admit it. I am not naive to the fact that I have on several occasions been blinded by my own pride and down right terrible behavior. I have thought that my actions were justifiable at the time or that I might have had the “right” to feel the way I did in a certain situation. But have I ever taken delight in evil? Still convinced of my innocence, my flesh wasn’t going to give that one up so easily.
Delight: A feeling of extreme gratification aroused by something good or desired.
Evil: Something that is a cause or source of suffering, injury, or destruction: the social evils of poverty and injustice.
Evil: Something that is a cause or source of suffering, injury, or destruction: the social evils of poverty and injustice.
WHAT THE... Again, Father God has brought me to my knees in conviction and has drawn out a covered up sin that I have chosen to bury. Though I do not feel that I have deliberately delighted in evil, God reminds me of several times of when I have taken the stance or a feeling that a person has deserved their suffering because of the hurt they have caused me or others.
For me, my hurt over the affair has caused me to rudely point the finger and say "you deserve what you get!" Deserve all the hurt, all the pain and at times I wish it was worse for you... just so you could feel the pain that I felt and what you took away from me. How stupid am I to admit that? Have I learned nothing from this recent conviction? Don't paint me as a vengeful person yet; remember I am still working through the hurt and moving on towards healing. And though I am still angry, I am convicted and question, who I am to judge whether or not their pain hasn't been as bad as mine. Or simply the fact, "Who am I to be OK with the suffering of someone else?!?!" WHO?!?!
More often than not the hurt that is there is just the enemy covering our eyes to the freedom we could have if we just gave it up. Instead we allow the enemy to stay and feed our pain and hide behind all our selfish reasoning. In the end, living in hurt and bitterness will only hurt us. We can all at times find ourselves delighting in evil, usually and unfortunately unaware of it. It can be as small as saying, “See, I told you so.” Or not even the words crossing your lips, but taking a prideful stance that you sure did warn them.
What God calls us to do is love one another and rejoice in the truth. John 3:21 “But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God." Let us not hold ourselves as better than any one else. To God, all our sins are the same. Who are we to delight in any hurt or suffering of others, even if we feel that it is justifiable? Would you want others to delight in your suffering?
In this walk, I have come so very far. Yet, there is still so much more for me to learn and walk through. I don’t think there is ever a point in someone’s life that they should stop growing and learning. All through life God allows things to happen to make us better, stronger people and to show us how faithful and amazing He is as our Father. I can rejoice in that truth alone.
Have you ever unintentionally found yourself being 'OK' with another person's hurt or suffering? What is God putting on your heart?
9 comments:
I struggle with this in regards to my inlaws. There are SO many hurt feelings, and SO much unequally yolked family problems. I often have to stop and remind myself that regardless if they will ever admit it, they are lost, hurting, and living so far from God. While I never wish them any harm, I find myself delighting in whatever way I can further myself from them, and that is NOT what God has called me to do. I struggle with it so much. I struggle with the selfish thought of "why can't I just have great inlaws" so much that I tend to let opportunities slip by. Opportunities to be a light. A light that has a hard time shining when it's smoldering in aggravation and resentment.
God has shown me so much, and has been ever patient with me. Proving to me all the more, that just as He is with me, I am to be with them. You're so right, though. We never stop growing. And while that is constantly stretching and disciplining us, I'd rather be in an eternal growth spurt, than to be content with my sin.
As much as it hurts, I'm so thankful for a Father who loves us enough to chastise us. Thank you for sharing your heart!
Oh Lyryn- thank you thank you a million times over. I'm sitting here crying (something I RARELY do) and just realizing that God is definitely trying to teach me this week.
In the past week God has used 3 totally unrelated situations/studies to convict, teach, and encourage me all at the same time. I can't give much detail to the situation because {she} possibly reads your blog and I haven't had a chance to ask for her forgiveness yet.
Obviously God REALLY wants me to learn that I have been not only having a bad attitude toward my friend but I've also been, in some strange way, thinking she deserves what she is going through. Incredibly selfish of me and unfair to her.
Thank you for your willingness to share the heart of God.
I struggle with this too sometimes, and I know that I shouldn't, but it just happens! We all have to work and deal with it in our own way! Thanks for sharing!
I admit that I struggle with this, too..... Thanks for your post...it really hits home today!
I feel this a lot. It's so hard to reign in that delight, because we often feel justified in it. But that's not what God desires for us.
Thanks for blogging about this!
Sometimes I think we share the same brain. :) God has been teaching me this ALOT over the past couple of weeks. And my mind always keeps coming back to where he says "Weep with those that weep, and rejoice with those that rejoice." It's hard to do sometimes, but we can do it!
I think this is something that everyone struggles with. Good for you for growing and recognizing it for what it is! Evil! I'm proud of you girl! Great post too!
Such a great post. I think this is an area where the enemy really gets us. The world teaches us "you get what you deserve" instead of compassion and understanding and sometimes it's hard to overcome those human tendencies.
We ALL struggle with this. What's important is that we recognize it and turn to God when we do and not allow those thoughts to take root.
So glad you blogged about this.
Post a Comment