Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Thick and Thin

Good lasting relationships are sometimes hard to come by because once we see a person for who they truly are we may not always appreciate what we see. When you have found someone who will accept you for ALL that you are, you can be sure that relationship is something special and definitely worth fighting for. Whether that special relationship in your life is a family member, a spouse or a good friend from college; a good friendship is one that will be there for you through thick and thin.

The word Friendship means a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard, also a person who gives assistance or support. George Elliot said "Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words." I also believe that a true friendship is a commitment to be there always. 

When Jesse and I were going through the affair, I struggled with that word “friendship.” It was a big factor in our conversations/arguments and at times left me somewhat broken and bruised. I really believe that was a big turning point in my life for trusting anyone who called me friend. Did they really mean it? If the man I was so in love with for the past 10 years and thought to be my best friend was telling me he was never my friend; how could ANY of my friendships be real? I felt completely alone and couldn’t find the words to express the way I was truly feeling. 

I guess in a way I went into survival mode, shutting everyone out and stopped believing that any of the friendships were genuine. I know now that was a bit extreme, because I do know that I had true friends that loved me and stood by me through the hurt and hopelessness I felt. They had seen the hurt, the pain and the mess his experience had caused in my life. I was blessed to have them there beside me, but it didn’t stop the enemy from coming in and reminding me that something had gone wrong with the one relationship I thought would never fail. 

Though that period in my life was the hardest thing I have ever dealt with, God kept reminding me that He could do all things. Yes, what happened in our marriage was terrible and wrong, but we can’t forget that God can do BIG things with big mistakes. It seemed impossible to heal this broken relationship, but then I shouldn’t limit God - after all He had done this before.

Take the story of Hosea and Gomer. (I would urge you to read the whole story Hosea 1:1-3:5) Gosh… and I thought I had it bad! Through adultery, then a child from the affair and then to slavery?! This was not God’s first time on this hay ride. This story showed me the most amazing love story. It showed me that even though someone can be wronged, betrayed and hurt; you can still have an unconditional love and deep relationship with this person. It’s an example of commitment, being there for someone at all costs. It also shows how God is merciful and has a redeeming love for us all. 

As Love at Last Sight tells us; “Thick and thin happen. Hard times – bad health, financial hardship, emotional loss are inevitable for the people you are close to. True relationship is often defined by how you show up for a friend or loved one in times of deep need and crisis. These experiences between two people develop deep roots that will never be forgotten, often yielding unexpected rewards and blessings for years to come.” 

As I read this statement I began to cry. I realized how blessed I was to have people (wink, wink) in my life that were there for me when I felt I couldn’t even stand. I believe that the reason I care so much about these amazing people in my life is because they will be forever rooted in my heart. They showed me in a season of loss, hurt and anger that their friendship was still unconditional. And I will be forever grateful to them. 

The Book Challenge 
(I just wanted to reiterate that these are not challenges that I’m making up. The questions come directly from the book.)
Can you recall a time when you came to someone’s aid and found yourself blessed in an unexpected way? Can you imagine yourself having a “Hosea love” in your life?


JamiLynnKastner said...


I know I don't "know, know" you... we're only "virtual" friends... but I LOVE your heart, your openness, your HONESTY!

May God bless you. May He hold you close. May He remind you TODAY that you are His BELOVED!

Much love to you,

Katie~Loves Of Life said...

beautifully written. I'd like to think that if I had any crisis I'd have a select few show up for me, too :)

Aishlea and Brandon said...

Beautifully said.......

Kristin Williams Balla said...

Wow. Rock on lovely daugther of mine! It is such a thrill to see God at work in the lives of my children. He offers us redemption in so many ways and you write about yours beautifully.

very married said...

wow - what a well-written way to open up your life. i'm impressed by your courage and strength.