Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Reliving a Mountain

Have you ever reached a mountain in your life that you thought you could never overcome? I think we have all been there. Of course the size of the "mountain" is different for each person, but we all experience them, right? What about reliving that mountain? That’s no fun… no fun at all.

Last month’s series was such an eye opening experience for Jesse and me. I emotionally relived a lot of what happened three years ago and at times it took me right back to that once insecure girl standing before this huge mountain I thought I would never be able to get over. I sure did second guess myself a lot last month, questioning if the whole series was a good idea or not.

There were days I felt encouraged and supported, days when I felt I was doing good in the world and that my story was something special to be told. There were days of excitement when I would get an email from a couple telling me that they now see hope for their own marriage. There were many days I felt fulfilled, like this is what I wanted to do with my life and could see a ministry taking form. I felt like I was doing what God called me to do!

But even though I believed we were being obedient to what God had called us to write about, things weren’t going to be that easy either. Being the emotional chickie that I am… the month took quite an emotional toll on me. There were days where I felt like a failure and that no one really gave two hoots about what I was writing. There were days I treated my husband like he was still the man he had been three years ago. There were days that I just stayed at home and cried. There were days I was staring that mountain down, wondering what the heck I was thinking by even opening myself up like this!

I told people when we started this series that if only one couple got something out of “Our Love Redeeming” series it would be worth every bit of what we went through. To know that another couple is fighting to keep their marriage alive because they saw what God did in our marriage… that makes it all worth it! Since the series began we have had tons of emails saying just that. So when I count the cost it was worth facing this mountain head on, once again.

Though this process was an emotional roller coaster for me, I can say that God did have His hand on us through this whole month. He continued to show Himself even greater through our life and our marriage. There were a number of posts that were super hard for me to relive, some emotions and memories, but more often than not it was more healing to my soul then it was harmful. There were things I had chosen to just bury instead of facing them and find healing. This series forced me to face that mountain head on and come to a place of healing that I so desperately needed. And for that I am thankful!!!

We both also wanted to make sure that everyone had their questions answered this past month. Did we miss anyone’s question? Let us know, because we are still open to talking about this. Again, we both want to thank everyone who supported us last month; your support was a huge blessing.

This journey is still being written, but the mountain is finally behind us.


Jill said...

I found your blog recently and your story has really touched me! I have a friend going through some tough times with her hubby, she wants out and is asking me for advice. I was so close to telling her to just walk away but after reading your story I can't do that. She has 3 kids and she needs to fight for her marriage. I realize though that her husband has to feel the same way!!

ann said...

lyryn, can i just start off by saying that i love your blog! i am a 20 year old college student and a follower of Christ. although i am not and have never been married, i want to thank you so much for your honesty and raw-ness through your blog. it is not only refreshing to hear others be real about life situations, but from a Christian standpoint, i feel it is so valuable for those of us who are not married. marriage is tough! and although i would never wish this situation on anyone, think of how many reading thing might encounter this type of struggle in their lives. and knowing that another member of the 'family' stood strong and fought the good fight has to be an encouragement in itself.

so thank YOU for being an encouragement to all of us. God has it all under control, and whether big or small mountain, He is near. God is doing BIG things through this story and way of ministry and i am so thankful i stumbled across your blog! keep 'em coming :]

Aishlea and Brandon said...

Girl, I think you touched a lot of people through your series. And I think what you said is so true...we all have mountains to climb and even though they are different sizes, it doesn't matter. It's still tough! Your story just proves God's faithfulness to help get us up and over that mountain no matter what.

Anonymous said...

I am truly blessed by reading your blog. I am a mid twenties married gal who has had plenty of struggles in our 3 year marriage. I too have been told by believers that I should "walk away" but I knew that God had bigger plans for my hub and me. I cant say that we have come as far as I would like but we are fighting for our marriage and God is faithful to bless our efforts.

Ashley @ KiwisandCocktails said...

Thanks for sharing your story. Sorry for my lack of commenting. It was really brave of you to share

Deanna said...

I love your blog. It really brought some healing to me from a situation that I was indirectly involved with. It was good to read and a real ministry to me. Also, as I'm getting married soon, it really made me think of some things about how on guard we need to be in our marriages.

One question I did have (and it's a silly one) is how is your name pronounced?

Sarah said...

Thank you again for sharing. SO proud of you and Jesse for being a light in a world that so often needs it. (Can't wait for the to get my flip flops - I sent mine off today!)